nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
