I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
