I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
