im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
