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• (315): View more from New York

  You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.

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• (619): View more from California

  Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  So Monday we're lesbians.

  (1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh

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• (305): View more from Florida

  We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.

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