Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
