I heard we made out
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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