I'm really into asian looking animals
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
