Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
