return my video game
another moral hangover. fuck.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
