well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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