Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
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