I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
