I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
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