real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
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New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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