all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize
