Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
