i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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