kristin has been a bad kristin
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
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