i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize