hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
