it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
