I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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