if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
