Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize