yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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