brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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