and you said cock pushups were impossible
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
