Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
