I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
