Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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