I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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