sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
