Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
she told me i tasted like america
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize