Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
i now understand why vodka
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
