I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
high people should be assigned attendants
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize