i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
