That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize