Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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