True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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