So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
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