I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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