I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
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