just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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