please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize