i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
