Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
