the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
So I just went to clothing optional bar
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
