theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
