Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
