I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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