kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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