people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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